7 Reasons Why Men Shut Down And Withdraw During An Argument... (2023)

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VonAlice

There are several reasons why men hang up during an argument. I know it can be very frustrating when you're in the middle of an argument or argument, but there are some really good explanations for why this is happening. Understanding the reasons why men close down can help you avoid feeling angry or hurt when this happens. One thing to remember is that it's not permanent; when they calm down, they come back to you.

1they are not women

Good ladies. Our men are men, not companion wives. Women have a high inhibition threshold for verbal exchanges, but men do not. They are not as verbose or emotional as we are. One of the reasons men tune out is that they simply get overwhelmed when an argument or argument is prolonged. If you want to avoid this, try not to talk forever; Give him the Cliff Notes version of what you really want to say.

2They are slow processors

This one took me forever to learn. My husband doesn't think or act as fast as I do. This isn't wrong, just different. When we're discussing something important, he often needs time to think and process what's going on. This used to really piss me off, but I've learned that if I relax and give him that time, he comes back to me and is very willing to end the conversation.

3They reach their limits

Most women are better fighters than men. Arguing has a much stronger physical effect on men than it does on women. Men are more likely to have an elevated heart rate and blood pressure. They can only hold out so long and then they have reached their limit and retreated. Finding a way to make your point without becoming overly dramatic can be helpful in keeping your man from turning off.

4you feel attacked

Often a man will interrupt an argument if he feels offended. If he feels you're not listening and it's not fair to hear his side of the problem, he may think there's no point in continuing to talk to you. To avoid this, stay calm and give him time to speak his mind. This doesn't mean you have to agree, but it's part of learning to fight fairly. Giving the man in your life time to speak his mind is a much better option than getting caught in the middle of an argument because he is pulling away from you.

5You are hurt

Men usually hang up because they are hurt. Despite pretending to be big and tough, our men have fragile feelings and egos. Sometimes we forget about this and end up doing serious damage to their feelings. A lot of times, a man will shut down when he's hurt because he just doesn't want to be hurt anymore. To avoid this, try to fight fairly. Avoid doing things that would take an argument into dangerous territory.

6You don't feel respected

Respect is very important for a man. I only understood this concept a few years ago. It's just as important to them as being loved, and that's a big deal. If you speak disrespectfully to a man in an argument, and I know it's hard not to be, there's a good chance he'll shut down and withdraw. Remember that the purpose of an argument is to resolve an issue and find common ground, not to win at all costs.

7they protect you

Many men get into an argument because they know they've reached their limit and are afraid to say something deeply hurtful to you. This is his way of protecting the woman in his life, even though it can seem like anything else when it happens. Men know their feelings and they know when they are reaching boiling point, so they make the decision to remain silent until they can calm down. Learning techniques that will help you fight fairly can prevent this. Remember, it takes two for an argument to get out of hand, and while you can only do your part, it makes a big impact.

It can be very frustrating when a man stops in the middle of an argument. Has this happened to you? Do any of these reasons apply to your situation?

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Comments

carbohydrateMale here I read this article and thanks for posting it means a lot to see this. Thank you very much.
DeniseIt's always what women have to do to make men happy. Where's the list on how to treat women?!!!
Flight attendantNumber 8 – Arguing with women is a waste of time because women KNOW they are always right. God help the man who cares to disagree with a woman, a feminist, or the almighty, his own wife. He may be young and inexperienced enough to think he can win an argument, but time will prove him wrong. By the way, women are NOT always right, even though they know that. On the off chance that a married man is reading this, if his wife thinks that the sun rises in the west, that 2+2 is 5, or that Queen Liz is a reptile from Mars, then that's true. Facts mean little or nothing to women. Feelings prove everything.
AdrianaMy last post went to #7
neishaI loved it! This will help me!! I needed this... let me be a man. 😌 they let us be us, but we don't let them be them
Rosawow...so men r men...thanks for this article...now i love my husband more than ever😍
SunnyThis is true! My boyfriend is shutting down and luckily I am reading the signs and trying to keep my emotions in check.
Alexishappens to me
spritzhhhThey protect us?? Really? About what
Ellagood article..
Ella@Emily.. Same here!!
KaseyInterest
WeissMen are from Mars, women are from Venus, which helped me a lot because now I argue with my friend. Happy reading if you have communication issues!
JesseA whole new world. Thanks. :)
Emilyso it's not just mine! I come from a passionate and talkative family. Dad is a writer, so everything is talked to death and then fixed there. It was quite a shock to discover that my husband prefers to "fix" things by falling asleep in a fight so he can forget about it in the morning! He totally shuts down and takes it personally even though it has nothing to do with him! It's reassuring to know it's not just him!!
pinkyI loved this article :-)